Are You Speaking Life Or Death

                                                          

                   I have even thinking a lot about words lately.How they impact us not just in the moment. Also it's effects of them in the future. 

                    I believe we are very guilty of speaking our minds in the heat of the moment. We opened our mouth and spewed whatever we thought was right at the moment. Whether it was right or wrong. Said in love or anger. However no matter what those words settle in the heart to whomever they were shared with. They either caused a crater of hurt or stitched with love.

     I went to my Daddy about these things. I know His Word has some things to say about the tongue. 

        Proverbs 18:21 Tells us the power of life and death are in the tongue

Proverbs 10:32 tells us our lips know what is fitting.

The lips of the righteous know what is fitting, but the mouth of the wicked only what is perverse” 

Proverbs 10:31 tells us our lips can bring forth wisdom.

The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, but a perverse tongue will be cut out” (verse 31).  

This is only a few scriptures on the tongue. However what power such a little part of my body has. It clearly teaches me that my words can bring much hurt or much good!  I took sometime to consider my words. Over time I grown leaps and bounds in the area. I can remember a time in my life I would just say what hit my mind not thinking what long term effects of my words would have on someone else! I now try with all my might to think before I speak words. Let me give you a illustration I have used many time in our children's ministries! 

   Our words are like toothpaste. Once I have squirted it out I am not put it back in the tube! Our words are the same! I can not take it back. They are out there good or bad.

      Our words have a negative and a positive effect on our lives. A good example of this, is if someone has always told you were fat and need to lose weight. No matter how small we become when we look in the mirror those words will always be there. Making us feel that I will never lose enough weight to be considered skinny. Now if you have been told you are beautiful over and over by those around you. When you look in the mirror you will be confident and not feel rejected but accepted. No matter what size you are! 

            Today though we live in a much different world than what I was raised with. Used to be if we wanted to get a mass message out with word good or bad in school. We would write a note and spread that not to everyone we possibly could. Now once that would be how a rumor  would begin and the social networking would begin! Eventually the rumor would make it to the person it was about! Good or bad those words just affected that person. Those words either spoke life or death! 

          Let's say the rumor was this .... I think Shellie's hair is a hot mess today! I don't know what ever made her think she should wear Minnie mouse buns at her age. She needs to dress and act like an adult not a child. 

     When I would hear that people thought of me, I would constantly think that no matter how I wore my hair or the clothes I decided to wear that day. I would think people were judging me and chances are I would never wear my hair that way again,

Now what it this was what was said... I love how Shellie is confident in herself. That she rocks her Minnie buns with her princess shirt and tutu!

  Now when I get dressed the next day and fix my hair. I am gonna feel confident in my appearance.

I am not going to be worried people are making fun of me for being me. 

    Today however things has changed so much! We now have cell phones we can text to send a message, we can email, and we have the mighty social media. Post pictures and give a sense of a perfect life. Or to used to make someone they are not good enough to have been included. These ways give us away to say things we want in a boldness. Often more times than not we are bold in a harsh way not in a way of speaking life. The screen gives us a sense of empowerment. We sometimes become a social bully. Sometimes we don't intend for that to happen it just does. We kinda feel like well if everyone else is giving their opinion theirs should be heard as well. Or instead of speaking like a sponge I absorbed your comments thinking they were meant for me!

 Please don't take me wrong it's okay to think for yourself and have a opinion. It does not mean I need to tell it outloud. The Bible says the power of life and death lies in our tongue.

                                        

      Before I speak or type anything I need ask myself a few things. Is it needed, is it kind, it hurtful or helpful. Here is a biggie! Would I say these things in person the same way? If the answer is no to any of these we should not say or type them. We shouldn't post things that makes others feel less than they are in their social group!

            We teach our children to be kind, not to be a bully,and to be the person God made them to be.Why are we not practicing those very things. In our world today there's so many things going on that spark the temptation to insert our opinion.

   We often put on a mask and become a totally different person than you portray in person. As if we have another personality. This person who becomes invincible online is the exact opposite in person when we are in a crowd of people. We are respectful and hold back our opinions. Most likely because someone you care about is right there with you, there is nothing worth saying to hurt the one I care about! Friend it's the same way when we are on social media. Those people we love and would never say anything to hurt them. Are right there on social media, hearing about a text or email. That just spoke death over them. This time of year for this year is and wonderful time to use politics for example! Everyone has an opinion! All of think that one or the other would be better to run out country than the other! Now using that as my example. At the end of the day God is gonna place the man he wants there in there. There is no reason for me to bash someone I love because they think the person opposite of them should be in office. Their choice should not make me spew comments, post, or gifs,that ever make them feel that I am speaking to them and making them feel like I do not love them. I am one way online and another in front of them. That is not what God intended for us!

    Guys social media can be used for so many wonderful ways of encouragement! It be used to speak life and wisdom. It should not be used to speak death. Something that my amazing husband has been teaching in his G.A.I.N.S Leaders course. Is that is we let negativity be absorbed it becomes an extension of who we are. We begin to compare and kill the things God has placed in you! We have let the power of the tongue steal the unique person God created you and I to be! 

Dolly Parton said it best when she said... "Find out who you are and do it on purpose." I want to add on and off the screen! 

Let's choose today to use our words to grow wisdom and love! Not negativity and hate.

 Think of the testimony's we would hear of God's Grace and love! If people knew they would be hated and killed with negativity because we may be uncomfortable. Our story is all different that is what makes us special!  

Ask yourself in closing are you proud of your on screen words?If not it's never too late change them!  If your being influenced by others maybe you need to make the decision to unfriend people who feed negativity. It's okay to do that you owe no one a explanation of why you are choosing to better you!

I know this may not be my most popular post! God laid this on my heart last Monday! It has taken me a week to get it typed out because I wanted to make sure I was not caught up in the negativity of the online world but rather sharing life and positivity! 

    I can't thank you enough for sharing a moment of your time with me today! I can not begin to explain how much that means to me!

                  Prayerfully Yours ~Shellie~

 

                       

Enjoy The Day Your In....

I have some very fond memories of my Momaw! She was a shear definition of a lady. She would get up every morning have her coffee and breakfast and then it was time for her makeup and hair to be done. She dressed up even if she was staying home! She wore lipstick to bed and her earrings  didn't come off till she was ready to lay down.  

I can still smell her face cream and her perfume she wore. She left many impressions on my life! One of the most important ones was how much she loved Jesus.

She often said if the the Lord willing tomorrow I will..... She knew that no matter what she had planned was not what He wanted it wasn't going to matter if God had other plans, for the day!

There is much to be learned there! We are all anxiously awaiting the lift of the stay at home order! Planning and talking about what we can't wait to do when we are set free again.  

Dreaming is a wonderful thing. Living in the day we have everything is even greater.

We have fallen away from what it means to cherish the moment we are in right now. Instead we are swallowed up in the fast pace of doing and cramming as much as we can into the 24 hrs we have been given. Often rushing through each task so fast we never acknowledge the gifts before us.

The Bible teaches us 

Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day May bring forth.

Proverbs 27:1.

I woke up yesterday and went to church in my home spent the afternoon sewing. Made plans to finish the small project pile I had left on my desk today. Until last night I had a episode with my heart due to pericarditis. All of my plans for today was suddenly canceled and a day of rest was what ordered.

We get so excited on what we want to do next.I am just as guilty! That we miss the blessing of now. I have learned so much during this whole virus mess. 

The biggest lesson is to live in the now! Love taking care of your family! Get dressed even if you are staying home. Take care of your home, it's a gift not all have! So when you have to pick that same toy up for billionth time just remember some would love that opportunity. We don't have to go out and spend money to make wonderful memories. We just have to be together for the fun to begin. We all have wished for more time to be with our families or to take care of our home. Spend more time doing things God has laid on our hearts to do. Like blog, write a book, sew, call a friend to catch up. God has given us the gift of time. However He wants us to spend some of that time with Him! 
     This virus has actually been a blessing and a curse. It has taken many and infected many more. It's caused some to lose jobs and cause uncertainty. For others we are able to be at home knowing we will be okay in the end.

                 No matter where we find ourselves today. What has God given you today to be thankful for it? Maybe it's to make your family that meal that takes awhile and hard to do during the week. Or spend time making cookies with your child. Maybe there is a book the Lord has laid on your heart to read or even write. Maybe you finally have time to have that tea party you have been promising your daughter. Or you are meant to dig in the dirt with your son today. You and I are called to live in this moment. Not tomorrow's moments 
   Because only Jesus knows what tomorrow truly holds. What if this virus is was meant to draw out families closer again and slow us down. To teach us to rely more on Him because of the unknown. To Teach us to be happy with what we have instead of never being satisfied. 

                                           

   Today I choose to be happy in today and wait to see what tomorrow brings. After all He is not surprised by it! I plan to pop popcorn and watch a movie with my family tonight! 
  I don't know what tomorrow may bring I trust my Daddy will take care of me no matter what it shall bring. I am not saying you should never plan for anything. I am saying don't cram your day so full you miss the gift of being present in the day  your in!

                   Thank you for stopping by and allowing me to share my thoughts with you! I hope you will stop back by again soon!  
              Prayerfully Yours ~Shellie 

When Life Is Turned Upside Down

                                                       

I won't lie I was on the fence about this post. My Momma heart really doesn't want to offend anyone but my heart is incredibly heavy. My girls are both grown and graduated. My oldest has already completed her college degree and my youngest is writing a book. I am super proud of both  them. 
                      However this social distancing have reminded me of a time that my Mommy world was torn upside down. I was working and loving every moment of being a preschool teacher and Pastors wife. I have always had a heart to work with kids! My passion actually I loved pouring into mine,their friends, my children's church, and preschool.
    My oldest daughter had some medical issues and became very sick with her asthma and a heart condition do not mix well! She ended being home bound which through us into homeschooling. I was nowhere prepared for this! I did not feel qualified to teach my children but here we were! I was going to do what the Dr was telling was best for my kids no matter what it took. 
    We have never looked back! Both of my children graduated with honors from homeschool. Both are beautifully educated and loved and grew up with normal childhoods with friends! They had proms adventures they would have never experienced if we had chosen to do it any other way. 
   I know that our world around us is on uncharted grounds. We are facing thing we have only read about and seen in movies! Like me Moms, you and your children have been thrown into homeschool. The world they knew including yours has changed Momma's! 
     I know you may not be happy they are home and maybe  you still have to work and still figure out how to maintain their schooling and the things you needed to do on a daily basis. 
           Let me encourage you Momma's you have been given this beautiful gift of time. Time you will always remember! Guess what you set the tone for how your home will react! Especially your kids. If they feel like they are a burden for you to care for their temperament is going to show it. God has given you time to pour into your kids rather it be helping them with school work or doing something special with them. This is a great time to teach them to be responsible and help out with life skills they will need when they leave home. Like washing clothes, helping make dinner, and cleaning the house. Do these things together. Find a book you can read aloud, have a tea party, I have a very close friend who had a tea party with her boys, so tea is not just for girls, find a book series you can read aloud, spend some time in the fresh air each day I promise you will thank me for it. Your so lucky to have someone who has already made your child's lesson plans for them and you don't have to spend hours trying to figure out which curriculum to buy and make the lesson plans to do with your child each day! Those of who homeschool or have understand what it takes and the hours spent to prepare lesson plans for the kids! All though someone has done this for you. You have this incredible opportunity to add to your child's education by helping them learn the things they are interested in becoming when they are older! For instance my youngest has always been creative and enjoyed writing! So I did extra literature  based lessons with her and art activities. When I could take them somewhere to enforce what I was learning I did that as well! That part may be hard right now! Yet there is a ton of videos and free presentations by zoos,  museums, documentaries, and educational TV shows, even historical fiction! Not all of these things were available to us when we first began. You have a wonderful advantage I did not have!
      I had a hard time adjusting at first it was new and foreign to us! We had moments of tears not just them but me as well! We made it through those moments. Now when I look back I wish that I had done that from the very beginning.  There was is beauty in the memories we had together! Time and moments I would never change. Moments in time that my kids are thankful for.  I was just thinking the other day I miss the days of playing Barbie with my oldest! We have the Barbie stuff  all over the house and play for hours! Then the moments playing doll for hour and planning tea parties with friends. Momma's don't see this time as a punishment I know it is scary some of you are out of work and are unsure of what comes next. Just remember the times that we are living in the crisis our children have been exposed too will go down in history. Our Grandchildren will read about what our world faced how God helped overcome Covid 19.
     I was talking and my youngest and my adopted child who comes and stays with us every other week for a few days because we live a good little ways apart. I am thankful for this time with them! Because it could mean that one of them or one of us could be sick but we are not we are a healthy for us and we are together! 
   In this time of uncertainty I asked her did she remember a book series we read together aloud every day as part of our schooling A Life of Faith series Millie Keith by mission City press. They went through a time of quarantine. We took time to talk about how it affected Millie's family. We compared how it was affecting us! We had several things in common but the major thing was this! God is in control and we will see a end to this and we will come out stronger because of Him! We just have to remember WHO we trust and the reason He has given you a gift of time. Time passes quickly and before you know they will be grown and not your babies anymore. What do you want them to remember from this time with you? You didn't want to be home you would rather for them to have been at school in someone else care. I can promise you there is a Mom who would give anything for that chance. Or a Mom who worries after she finishes her shift at the hospital she doesn't take this home to their family. God have us the greatest gift as women no matter the circumstances to serve our family and love them. To treasure each and every moment to grow stronger in each other and in our faith. I pray for our world each and every night that God will speak the word that He can and bring healing and  peace to our world. To our loved ones who are sick and those I don't even know! To protect the ones who are on the front lines minersting in the hospitals! Our president as he works tirelessly to protect our nation. The Bible tells us to train up a child in the way they should go, and when they grow older they will not turn from it. Instead of grumbling let's show them the beauty of being together. The beauty of being a family and wanting to be together.
A few years ago I alm0st died during a surgery and I have never looked at things the same, Since I have been diagnosed with a incurable disease. It makes each and every day a gift. It's forever a reminder that each and everyday is a gift that we are not promised! One of my favorite things we do now is when we talk about the memories we made and how thankful they are for the time we had that we can never get back!
    How have you spent your time? Are you grumbling or are you making memories? I promise they are gonna remember both! 
I hope you know I say these things in love and a heart that wants nothing more than for all of us to come out of this stronger than ever not broken and rebuilding. 
Let the reminder of Matthew 6:25-26 That God cares for us and will provide our needs!
25 Therefore I say unto you, Be not anxious for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than the food, and the body than the raiment? 26 Behold the birds of the heaven, that they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; and your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are not ye of much more value than they?

Thank you for coming by and letting me share my heart with you! I am praying for your families that God meets the needs of each of you!  We have to remember no matter what God has got this and this to shall we come out of this stronger and closer than ever before!

I also would like for you to check out my Bestie's new blog! It's going to be amazing! Follow the link below to check it out!
https://themom2mom.com/ 

A Woman After Gods Own Heart

The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;

4That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

5To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Titus 2:3-5

     As a pastors wife, homeschool mom, and the list could go on lol.... I am constantly trying to grow deeper in my walk with Lord. So the ladies of our church has embarked on a life changing adventure! We recently started studying the Woman After Gods Own Heart, By Elizabeth George. Ohhh my has it totally opened my mind and heart up to somethings that needed to change.

    As a pastors home it is very easily to get lost in things of the  ministry. Especially when your children are no longer kittle and need your full attention all the time...

   Our phones are constantly going of whether its text, email, or phone calls, this goes on from sun-up to sun-down. It was when I was reading the other morning and she began to speak of making your family number one. She said  its okay to return phone calls later, and schedule when people visit, during my scheduling make sure you schedule time with them to celebrate.

    This was a everyday  practice in our home when our girls were little, but the ages of 17 and 21 doesn't really require the attention they once did. So I began to pray and ask God show me what I need to change. I told Him to open my spiritual eyes so my heart would truly pay attention.

   What He revealed really hit home ! I do well keeping our home running well, everyday chores done and doing what I am physically able to do, I celebrate my sweet amazing husband and my beautiful girls! I am doing well praying for them... What I was failing them in was my one on one attention. I have always had a drop by as you need policy. That's wonderful unless your on your way to lunch in between your oldest class and work schedule and the unannounced visit caused us to miss our lunch date.... He showed me its okay to ask for someone to give me a quick call if it isn't something that I need to address right that moment in a counseling setting. Ouch I must say that one hurt a little ! I have a terrible year with my health and well My girls go out of their way to help me and make me feel loved ! I need to make sure that nothing keeps me from the same for them. It was like Jesus just gave me a get out jail free card ! 

    So I decided right then, I would ask for friends just to make sure I don't have plans before they just show up! Amazingly they totally understood.

    Yet my Daddy (God) wasn't done yet lol... He showed me that their are times my phone can be put away! I do not need to be answering a text in the middle of one my sweet family members are trying to share or ask me something ! When we have family game night or family movie night my phone can go silent for a few hours ! The world will  be okay if they have to wait a few hours on me !

    These things hit hard for this Mommy who loves to spoil her family to know end with love! I had no idea I had let these things creep in unnoticed. I don't want our family memories be, when we were off our phones we had a great time..... but they had to wait till we wasn't distracted for the fun to begin. Or I was to distracted to be there for them when they needed me, whether to share joy, bad news, to sometimes just be present and give a hug or a prayer. To share with them what God thinks and be present to show them the way. Instead I want them to share the memories of us being present, constant laughter, love. and supporting no matter what was going on ! I WANT THEM TO WANT TO FOLLOW IN MY FOOTSTEPS. I want to set the Godly example spelled out for me in the Bible in all things I do .... To always say my Mom or wife had time for me no matter what is going on !

   So I am pleased to say that I have made the changes that needed to be changed and I couldn't be happier to follow Gods instructions in Titus ! Its my job to manage my home, care for my husband and children! To set the mood for our home each and everyday! To keep God, my husband, and girls first and then the rest can follow!

                 I am super excited to be participating in this linky party click the link below !
                                        Click Here  http://proverbs14verse1.blogspot.com/